When I was a kid and we wanted to play war games we'd grab a couple sticks or maybe a toy gun and head off to the vacant lot. I must admit, when I was a litte older the sticks and toy guns were occasionally replaced with bb guns. We decided that wasn't the brightest thing to do one day when my brother shot me in the forehead and it swelled up like goose egg. That was really dumb...but kids will be kids. These days kids can get a more realistic and much safer battlefield experience with paintballs. Don't get me wrong it's not a completely safe adventure but I'd be willing to bet that kids are more likely to get hurt skate boarding or even playing a backyard game of tackle football. And besides, if there's not a certain element of danger then most kids aren't going to be interested for very long. The idea of testing your skills against others who can shoot a wad of paint at you from 45 yards away and leave you looking like a bad Picasso painting is thrilling. That's right, the idea is thrilling...but once you get geared up and actually head out onto the field of battle it gets borderline terrifying. Especially when you're dealing with a dozen ten year olds who have you targeted like a Thanksgiving turkey. We recently had my twin's 10 year old birthday party at Gizmo Guru's paintball fields just outside of Waco. They of course insisted that I play and of course I couldn't decline. My kids say the reason I don't snowboard is that I'm too old and too fat...ouch! I decided I much rather get hit by a few paintballs than go thru that pain again. The last thing that a father wants to do is hurt his kids. It was a little unnerving to realize that those sentiments are not reciprocated by my kids. As soon as the whistle blows it's game on. Keep in mind these are my own kids and their friends that I love like my own kids...they're all zinging paintballs at me like I owed them money. It didn't take long for the survival instincts to kick in and I started firing back.Before long I was making rolling dives behind the barricades then popping back up with the gun blazing. In my mind I was thinking Bruce Willis in "Die Hard"...in reality more like Homer Simpson. But at least I proved to them that I was not too old and fat to be competitive at paintball wars.

I don't know what the child psychologists think about paintball. I'm sure some would say that it'll turn them all into homicidal maniacs...I dunno...it's got to be better than pelting each other with bb guns. By the way, don't tell my mom about that.